I've come to realize that the reasoning for one situation doesn't always apply to a similar situation... or does it?
Work is like a relationship.
• I would NEVER stay with a man who didn't respect me or value my opinion.
• I would NEVER stay with a man who I felt presented constant opportunities for me to feel less of a person.
• I would NEVER stay with a man who made me want to run out the door screaming/crying 85% of the time.
• I would NEVER stay with a man just because I liked his friends.
• I would NEVER stay with a man who caused me to have my friends "talk me off the ledge of insanity" with the "it's not you, it's him line" constantly
• I would NEVER stay with a man who gave his best to my friends but saved only the crap for me.
• I would NEVER stay with a man just because he gave me money. (In fact, I'd be appalled at the implication)
• I would NEVER stay with a man in an unhappy situation just because I didn't know what the future had in store.
• I would NEVER stay with a man because my past relationships only lasted a year and I didn't want the "track record"
• I would NEVER stay with a man just to have the facade of happiness and security, but be truly drained and miserable.
• I WOULD NEVER. (insert here that I'm sooo thankful for KJ b/c making this list was also a little reminder of how happy I am to be with him. Because he gives me the Good Times, I can clearly see the Bad Times...)
Now, to even a crazy person, it seems as though the above reasonings can be applied to a job. Don't you think?
Soooo, why do I get up every morning and come to this place for 8 hours??? Why do I spend most of my time in a miserable situation that leaves me questioning my ability.
Why have I let this "relationship" drag wayyyy past the good times. When the tides turn and people change, doesn't that allow one to have the optional OUT. The "this is not what I signed up for....I'M OUT!" card.
I promised you all I wouldn't complain anymore. I'm not. Just asking for your prayers that I'll look out for me and do what's best for me in this situation. That I'll heed to God's answers and either find peace or a new paycheck supplier. Sometimes there's that moment of hesitation before a break-up even when YOU KNOW the relationship is DEAD or PARASITIC. I think fear keeps us from letting go instantaneously. Good thing I'm more annoyed than scared huh?
On the up side. Cmas cards are going in the mail (yep, this is roz and it is the 15th) and my Lana-Lana and her Roc will be here this afternoon. The horizon of a wonderful weekend is in view. It's going to take a lot for me not to stuff KJ and myself in their trunk to be smuggled back across the state line come Sunday. ;-D Weekends are NEVER long enough.
Happy (trying my hardest over here) Friday!!!!
3 comments:
GOSH, that was such a way to put it.....I QUIT...(gulp), No really it's time. Thanks for bringing it into perspective for me.
I only pray that youf ind peace and another paycheck supplier soooooooon....like Monday!!! Keep your head above teh crap and put your search goggles on!!!
Please, please QUIT! Life's too short to be with a crappy man or a crappy job. You could quit now and enjoy the holidays. Whenever you decide to, it's going to be a good day to leave that place behind. I'm thinking of you and I don't think you're complaining, I think you're venting which is totally different. Keep your head up and start packing your things, as soon as I think to myself "I am leaving... this... place..." I immediately feel better. Don't be afraid of the future either, you always surpass yourself with every step you make. And hell, look at Brandi. She had like 3 jobs in one year and now she's doing fine cause she found the good one.
And after all, at least it's Friday...
Wow! I am very impressed at your analogy! I know its awful right now. I am constantly thinking about you and I totally understand why you don't just QUIT. That is so much easier said than done. And you are exactly right about fear keeping us in a bad aituation. As much as we want to put our "big girl panties" on and say that we can face anything, the unknown is terrifying!! Things WILL get better, one way or another. I am a firm believer in that. I remember a best friend of mine told me one time when I was going through some really tough stuff, "This too, shall pass" And she was right:)
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